Mo' Mo

I was flipping the dial last night and stopped on a baseball game. The camera switched from play on the field to the announcers in the box, and guess who I saw? It was Mo Vaughn, recently retired, I guess. He had this high squeaky voice.

Wait a second, that wasn't Mo. And it wasn't that first baseman on the Cal girls softball team from a couple of years ago either.

Holey crap, it was Tony Gwynn. Tony looked like the Michelin man. His waist has to be over 50, and his upper arms look like my thighs. And my thighs are fat! Tony, what the hell happened to you?

I'm reminded of the season that the Pickled Pecklers decided to dump steals right from draft night. Our theory was that every steal was some other stat that we could use, so we tried to get none. Our team's leading base stealer that season? Tony "Mo" Gwynn.

You can look it up.